Beginnings

_{Featured image credit: Danielle MacInnes on Unsplash}

Kairos (Greek): the delicate, fleeting and yet perfect moment, right time and right place that creates the opportunity for actions, words, or movement.

Throughout my life I’ve had many false starts, and would-be starts, what I thought were starts which were actually endings, but most of all, I’ve spent much of my time waiting for the perfect conditions to establish before I start and as a result I have not started.

My beginnings tend also to be my ends. I give up when the self-critic in my head decides I need a reality check. Suddenly, the molehill has morphed into a mountain.

I have been waiting for Kairos to hit me for so long; hoping it will strike like some sort of divine intervention and I’ll wake up one morning with everything having fallen into place and all my concerns, insecurities and anxieties will have melted away.

But perfect doesn’t exist whereas many excuses and reasons do. Thus, in not starting I have inadvertently kept myself stuck in one place, too scared to move in any direction.

Long ago, I told myself right here is comfortable, its familiar, its easy. But man am I bored. And the longer I stay here the more uncomfortable everything becomes, the familiar disintegrates as others move forward within their lives, and my life turns to restless uneasiness as I realise there is a lot more out there in the big wide world.

Maybe it is time I realised that Kairos is so delicate and so fleeting it may as well not exist. And to achieve anything means working through the moments deemed imperfect.

To achieve anything in life you just have to begin.